Memories of Parents

Morning mist, known by coastal folk clears slowly to reveal memories. Silhouette becomes visible jaunty walk, a cheese cutter hat on head remember you well or maybe not. Cool and calm, never a shout look of the eyes or maybe a nod temper never lost, occasional swear word A touch or a handshake lost in translation. Wait until your father comes home threat dealt with by looks, quiet life is all he asked, doing his best, remembering upbringing. His bastion his shed full of bird life, canaries' budgies, all large as life talking and tweeting all at once. Cup of tea calling, spoon rattled loudly response was instant, comfort was calling. Memories of my Dad rattle around my brain no words of love no sounds exchanged, ruffle of the hair the only acknowledgement. Came the day a farewell was given standing on a cold railway station, shake of the hand a look in the eyes Gone, gone forever, changes did not happen. Mother just stood, terror in her eyes, eldest was leaving she did not ask why. No hugs no kisses just look of dismay tears flowed but still no interaction I blame myself for all this unfolding why oh why am I this way? I need to stand with parents by my side, Explain, just explain what is gone before faces and your words drift past me each day I love you, never said, one chance, thrown away.