Mel the Bat

Some people have dogs and cats. But the pet that I chose is a ban. He's very beautiful and his name is Mel. When people see him, they run like hell. Owning Mel is something that I don't regret. .But I have no social life because I have a bat for a pet. Women come to my house and scream when they see Mel flapping around. They want nothing else to do with me or Mel after they faint and fall down. One damn woman nearly killed Mel when she sprayed him with Raid. I love my bat but because of him, I have no chance of getting laid. When a 900 pound woman fainted and fell down, she caused and earthquake. Mel and I were both frightened when everything started to shake. My own brother wouldn't visit me on a whiskey bet. If you want a social life, don't get a bat for a pet.