Hiya Sharma Poet Monchielle Stanza

Marine Majesty

A winged mermaid blossoms, 
awash with marine snow ~
Poseidon's ocean-pearl,
breathing jasmine sirens
as iced eyelashes curl... 

A winged mermaid blossoms,
when fish-angels ache for
arctic apricity,
and glacial nymphs carve a
cruel felicity... 

A winged mermaid blossoms, 
as strawberry conch shells,  
drape the neon sea-star ~ 
my minty sun trembles,
and sheds its sherbet scar... 

A winged mermaid blossoms, 
hearts of manta rays swath
with love's ivory rose - 
unfurling aqua kins, 
that ruby thorns unfroze...

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William Kelii Kekaula January 3, 2024 at 7:11 PM I don't believe that I've done this form but, Hiya, what an illuminating example. I believe yours be the first of my reading. Syllabically wondrous, a definite Fave, my friend. A notable refrain, as well. Ah challenge afoot, but yours takes center stage. Aloha 2024, William

Bill Baker December 29, 2023 at 4:13 PM I added this one to my FAVs list, Hiya. The imagery was eloquent, and your poem was smooth to read. "A winged mermaid blossoms", to begin each verse created a nice transition between them. Have a great New Year, my friend. Happy 2024! Bill

Tonye George December 29, 2023 at 10:00 AM This is what I love about Hiya, I really love the use of metaphoric words, they add all the flare and make it heavenly. What a nice piece, mermaids, sirens, jasmine.... All my favourite stuff. "A winged mermaid blossoms, hearts of manta rays swath with love's ivory rose" I love. Compliments of the season dear.

Charlotte Puddifoot December 28, 2023 at 9:48 AM very pretty poem, with a nice sprinkling of alliteration, not too much.."sheds its sherbet scar", i like that, also the last line

Eve Roper December 28, 2023 at 9:01 AM Great flow and imagery, Hiya. Enjoyed reading. Hugs eve

Hilda Greenhough December 28, 2023 at 8:06 AM Marine Majesty is a poem that has description on many fronts; newness of blossoming, strength of ocean, and the cold ocean temperatures. The mermaids created a vulnerable element. Thank you. I'll put this with favorites.

Sotto Poet December 28, 2023 at 6:27 AM Dear Hiya, Your poem is an artistic masterpiece, emanating an entrancing melodic quality. The incorporation of the recurring phrase "A winged mermaid blossoms" at the beginning of every verse served as a clever adornment, providing the poem with an enticing cadence. Your remarkable imagery provides access to a world of vibrant and evocative visuals. Your poetic spirit is beyond praise. Engaging with your work is an intriguing endeavor, as it exudes beauty and brilliance. BOL with the contest

Sara Kendrick December 28, 2023 at 4:15 AM This one reads like a good contender for the contest to me. Way to go. I like your repeat line that flows. Thank you for sharing it with us and for dropping by my page. Sara K

Paige Hind December 27, 2023 at 7:26 PM Very beautifully done, was a pleasure to read!

Clive Culverhouse December 27, 2023 at 3:41 PM A winged mermaid blossoms through a melodious piece of poetic expresson, well written Hiya

Vijay Pandit December 27, 2023 at 12:43 PM Splendidly articulated despite the syllable constraints of this form. Images adorned in splendor of your words. Awesome display of your poetic prowess, Hiya.

Silent One December 27, 2023 at 11:34 AM I have seen you blossom on poetry soup, you poems have improved so much by being on here, away from Instagram.. here you have learned new forms and adopted them very well... a good refrain to make this poem flow so well.. as colourful as always and with the use of unique metaphors... Well done and all the best in the contest..

Jay Narain December 27, 2023 at 9:47 AM Nice monchielle capturing beauty of sea. Hiya Sharma January 1, 2024 at 6:00 AM Thank you so much for your kind feedback, I truly appreciate it :)

Ink Empress December 27, 2023 at 9:02 AM My mermaid heart blossoms as i read this monchielle, so well crafted and so well flowing with brilliant metaphors and oceanic wordplay, im having a migraine attack so let me be a bit short but point out what i love about this monchielle, i love your use of words and how youve set it to a wintry yet oceanic theme and how your title has alliterations. And i always love a poem that has a bit of mythology in them, it adds beauty, while this form can be a bit tough to elaborate more.. youve done an Hiya Sharma December 29, 2023 at 12:54 AM Awwn, your mermaid heart is so beautiful, dear Ink.. I know you love oceanic imageries and marine wordplay. I just wanted to come up with a mystical mythological theme for this monchielle, as it's my first time trying it.. was a bit nervous writing..Your words truly warm my soul & I'm so happy to know that you loved reading this :) Ink Empress December 27, 2023 at 9:03 AM Exquisite take with colors etc, im sure another top win for you. I love the last lines the most. As an islander i vibe with this, nailed it, bol for the contest. I love it