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Marine Majesty

A winged mermaid blossoms, awash with marine snow ~ Poseidon's ocean-pearl, breathing jasmine sirens as iced eyelashes curl. A winged mermaid blossoms, when fish-angels ache for arctic apricity, and glacial nymphs carve a cruel felicity. A winged mermaid blossoms, as strawberry conch shells, drape the neon sea-star ~ my minty sun trembles, and sheds its sherbet scar. A winged mermaid blossoms, hearts of manta rays swath with love's ivory rose - unfurling aqua kins, that ruby thorns unfroze.

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Hilo Poet

Date: 1/3/2024 7:11:00 PM

I don't believe that I've done this form but, Hiya, what an illuminating example. I believe yours be the first of my reading. Syllabically wondrous, a definite Fave, my friend. A notable refrain, as well. Ah challenge afoot, but yours takes center stage. Aloha 2024, William

Bill Baker

Date: 12/29/2023 4:13:00 PM

I added this one to my FAVs list, Hiya. The imagery was eloquent, and your poem was smooth to read. "A winged mermaid blossoms", to begin each verse created a nice transition between them. Have a great New Year, my friend. Happy 2024! Bill

Tonye George

Date: 12/29/2023 10:00:00 AM

This is what I love about Hiya, I really love the use of metaphoric words, they add all the flare and make it heavenly. What a nice piece, mermaids, sirens, jasmine.... All my favourite stuff. "A winged mermaid blossoms, hearts of manta rays swath with love's ivory rose" I love. Compliments of the season dear.

Charlotte Puddifoot

Date: 12/28/2023 9:48:00 AM

very pretty poem, with a nice sprinkling of alliteration, not too much.."sheds its sherbet scar", i like that, also the last line

Eve Roper

Date: 12/28/2023 9:01:00 AM

Great flow and imagery, Hiya. Enjoyed reading. Hugs eve

Hilda Greenhough

Date: 12/28/2023 8:06:00 AM

Marine Majesty is a poem that has description on many fronts; newness of blossoming, strength of ocean, and the cold ocean temperatures. The mermaids created a vulnerable element. Thank you. I'll put this with favorites.

Sotto Poet

Date: 12/28/2023 6:27:00 AM

Dear Hiya, Your poem is an artistic masterpiece, emanating an entrancing melodic quality. The incorporation of the recurring phrase "A winged mermaid blossoms" at the beginning of every verse served as a clever adornment, providing the poem with an enticing cadence. Your remarkable imagery provides access to a world of vibrant and evocative visuals. Your poetic spirit is beyond praise. Engaging with your work is an intriguing endeavor, as it exudes beauty and brilliance. BOL with the contest

Sara Kendrick

Date: 12/28/2023 4:15:00 AM

This one reads like a good contender for the contest to me. Way to go. I like your repeat line that flows. Thank you for sharing it with us and for dropping by my page. Sara K

Mat Ignacio

Date: 12/27/2023 8:14:00 PM

unfurling aqua kins, that ruby thorns unfroze - beauty of a finish

Paige Hind

Date: 12/27/2023 7:26:00 PM

Very beautifully done, was a pleasure to read!

Tom Woody

Date: 12/27/2023 5:05:00 PM

Yeah, but can she dance? Thought not. Still, she seems to possess certain charms, as you poetically and skillfully relate

Hiya Sharma
Date: 12/29/2023 12:52:00 AM

Haha, I didn't think of it, true ! But that's an intriguing thought.. If there can be a winged mermaid, then why can't there be a dancing one lol :) Thank you so much for your kind feedback, dear Tom, I truly appreciate your support always ~

Sara Etgen-Baker

Date: 12/27/2023 3:55:00 PM

beautifully crafted, almost melodious poem, dear Hiya. I especially liked how you began each verse with 'A winged mermaid blossoms. That 'refrain' grounded the poem....outstanding imagery as well, Hiya...so many good things to say about your poem and your poetic spirt. I love reading your work, for it's compelling and full of light and beauty. Have a splendid evening, Sar

Clive Culverhouse

Date: 12/27/2023 3:41:00 PM

A winged mermaid blossoms through a melodious piece of poetic expresson, well written Hiya

Vijay Pandit

Date: 12/27/2023 12:43:00 PM

Splendidly articulated despite the syllable constraints of this form. Images adorned in splendor of your words. Awesome display of your poetic prowess, Hiya.

Silent One

Date: 12/27/2023 11:34:00 AM

I have seen you blossom on poetry soup, you poems have improved so much by being on here, away from Instagram.. here you have learned new forms and adopted them very well... a good refrain to make this poem flow so well.. as colourful as always and with the use of unique metaphors... Well done and all the best in the contest..

Jay Narain

Date: 12/27/2023 9:47:00 AM

Nice monchielle capturing beauty of sea.

Hiya Sharma
Date: 1/1/2024 6:00:00 AM

Thank you so much for your kind feedback, I truly appreciate it :)

Ink Empress

Date: 12/27/2023 9:02:00 AM

My mermaid heart blossoms as i read this monchielle, so well crafted and so well flowing with brilliant metaphors and oceanic wordplay, im having a migraine attack so let me be a bit short but point out what i love about this monchielle, i love your use of words and how youve set it to a wintry yet oceanic theme and how your title has alliterations. And i always love a poem that has a bit of mythology in them, it adds beauty, while this form can be a bit tough to elaborate more.. youve done an

Hiya Sharma
Date: 12/29/2023 12:54:00 AM

Awwn, your mermaid heart is so beautiful, dear Ink.. I know you love oceanic imageries and marine wordplay. I just wanted to come up with a mystical mythological theme for this monchielle, as it's my first time trying it.. was a bit nervous writing..Your words truly warm my soul & I'm so happy to know that you loved reading this :)

Ink Empress
Date: 12/27/2023 9:03:00 AM

Exquisite take with colors etc, im sure another top win for you. I love the last lines the most. As an islander i vibe with this, nailed it, bol for the contest. I love it