Manned Mission To Mars
(Apologies to Rudyard Kipling)
If you can cope with no view of the trees but only sky
if you can navigate some toenail clippings floating by
if you can use duct tape to stop a wound from bleeding faster
because you're 90 million miles from the chemist for some plasters
if a flatulant spaceman's gasses reach your lungs and start to fill you
and you can't open a window for that very act would kill you
if you like the taste of potato processed like papier mache
and don't mind drinking real ale with a straw from out a sachet
if you know that the Rams are playing Man United with a full gate
but can't get the result for thirteen hours to celebrate
if when systems start to fail and all hope is gone
and you should have stayed inside the bar of the White Swan
if boldly going somewhere is your real idea of fun
then you deserve all credit, and you'll be a man, my son.
LLAP
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