Magnum Opus
My mind is empty
Like a long corridor
With a light flickering
On and off
The paint is peeling
And chunks fall from the ceiling
A pen rolls across the floor
Useless and without ink
So I pick it up
And stab myself
Letting blood fill the pen
So I can write a final verse
Over the falling walls
For even in victory
I found a way to lose
A light push on the door
And it shrieks as it opens
Letting light splash over my face
I'm momentarily blinded
Before my eyes adjust
The world outside is ghastly
The sky is black
With scarlet clouds
And twisters loom in the distance
It's a city in ruins
But a siren still warbles a warning
As if anyone's around to hear
It's all in my head
Square dancing
With my masochistic tendencies
Just one last verse
My pen is running a little dry
Like my eyes
Because I've got nothing else to give
I thought in time I'd find peace
That I'd find someone
But I can't even get over my own faults
So I wonder
How anyone else could
Because this ruined world
Was of my own creation
Piece by piece
I destroyed it all
And the worst part is
I simply smiled
But now my heart is starving
It's racing faster and faster
Making friends is so rudimentary
And yet it's a skill I don't possess
So I waste away in my own head
Writing verses to lessen the pain
That rips me apart again and again
Again and again
I revisit ten years ago in my dreams
Because it's all I've got to keep going
The sirens screech louder
The twisters loom larger
And this damn building is slowly collapsing
Don't know if I could say it any other way
I'm suffocating in my own memories
My fingernails bite deep
Leaving trails of blood on my arms
But I don't feel anything
My screams are silent
Because I'm screaming in my head
A cacophony of chaos
Is all around me
But on my face I've plastered a smile
On the outside I'm doing fine
But I'm just begging
I'm pleading
Someone come and save me from myself
Because I'm running out of words
But the pain is getting worse
And my mind is empty
Copyright © Christopher Goss | Year Posted 2018
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