Love Biscuits

Walking the yard with shovel in hand
Cruising back and forth just as planned
Trying to pick up every last pile
If the wife steps in one she gets hostile

Didn't think this through from the start
Three dogs are great but this from the heart
Of the many jobs you have to do
The dirtiest of all is picking up poo

Dogs are creative with their poo
Over the years I've seen a few
So here are a couple of the best
Not enough room to list the rest

The Walking poo is always a trip
Spreads out in one long strip
Why can't they be still and squat
Could they please stay in one spot

Elephant poo is a surprise when found
This mammoth pile weighs about a pound
It really stands out above them all
Quite a feat because my dogs are small

If you have a party here is a tip
Be careful with the onion dip
Dogs really like that goo
But it leads to Diarrhea poo

Purple is a color you don't want to find
It's hard to get this one out of your mind
The Hide and Seek poo will keep you busy when done
Searching to find what's been eaten,what fun

From Kalamazoo to Timbuktu
Nothing is like the Houdini poo
Now you see it now you don't
Keep your eyes on it, this one will float

Winter cleanup can sometimes be hard
Snow after snow just covers the yard
Making layers upon layers of Icicle poo
Remember the horror of the thaw of '02

Just when you think the job is over
One more little gift from Rover
What's that on the bottom of your shoe
Nothing but a piece of Camouflage poo

If you have dogs this is nothing new
I'm just really tired of picking up poo


Contest: Everyone Poops
Sponsored by: Roy Jerden
Written by:Greg Hoffman  8/20/2015

Copyright © | Year Posted 2015



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Date: 9/24/2015 11:46:00 AM
Greg, Congrats on your win. Another interesting contest. LOVE SKAT
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Date: 9/22/2015 7:43:00 AM
What a way to tell a story and make it a winner...
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Date: 9/22/2015 2:59:00 AM
Greg. Congrats on the win. Have 5 dogs so this resonates.
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Date: 9/22/2015 2:46:00 AM
Congrats on this winning write. I have more than 3, but I have never had trouble as you so vividly put it. If you read my poem Talking Dog you'll understand why.
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Date: 9/22/2015 1:51:00 AM
Well done, Greg. From a Cat owner :)
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Date: 9/22/2015 12:22:00 AM
Congrats on ur very witty winning write Greg!
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Date: 9/21/2015 8:22:00 PM
This is a great one, Greg. Thank god it's not a scratch and sniff story though!
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Date: 8/30/2015 7:19:00 PM
Yeah... been there.. done that :) Our Border Collie is "infamous" for the "walking poo".. Awesome write on one of life's 'real world' topics. ~~X~~
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Date: 8/21/2015 6:58:00 PM
This was so different and funny. I really liked it!
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Date: 8/21/2015 6:07:00 AM
Big 7.....laughed all the way through...Best of Luck in the Contest...sure is a winner to me.....
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Date: 8/21/2015 5:50:00 AM
You're tired of picking up poo. Many will agree with you on that one. Best of luck in the contest. ~~Darlene
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Date: 8/21/2015 5:50:00 AM
You're tired of picking up poo. Many will agree with you on that one. Best of luck in the contest. ~~Darlene
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Date: 8/21/2015 2:17:00 AM
ha ha ha this is hilarious - i do love a good poop poem and this is a great eaxmple:-) good luck in the contest:-) hugs jan xx7
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Date: 8/21/2015 12:21:00 AM
oh my gosh, this is the ULTIMATE poo poem. WELL DONE. It should PILE UP to the top of the S%$%$ List. hahaha. It is great humor.
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Allison Avatar
Jan Allison
Date: 8/21/2015 2:17:00 AM
love your comment Andrea! hugs jan xx
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