Lost Concentration

Broken back Add upon the weight To force a bow You broke my heart I hate you for all that you are not Broken spirit Say it twice to get it right To choke the thought You broke my heart I feed you to the animal you’ve created You torture me with what I can never be You’ve abandoned me, I am an orphan I am an orphan, the bastard son of a corpse No matter how long I lie in the bed The sheets remain always cold No matter how long I let the wound bleed I still feel like I’m drowning So with this and that put down I know nothing else matters Nothing else matters as much you used to But now There is nothing I am a ghost, in the absence of mirrors I am an echo, in the absence of substance I long for everything that only loss can give to me I hate my own words I am slowly growing weary of the pen It no longer soothes; my fingers ache from the pressure I despise my own voice, as only I will hear it I am full of loss I want nothing more than to lose myself in the crook of someone’s neck But the pain of forcing the tears kills the comfort I am tired and bored of the words stuck in everyone else’s throat I want someone else to fill in my blanks I want to close my eyes And go to sleep Just go to sleep But that is too easy, and I will give nothing more to God So, I’ll cry myself to sleep or at least cry to myself