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Lightning Bolts and All That Stuff

 ~ A Lighthearted Look at Cheating on Keeping Kosher ~

         Pick my poison, shrimp or pork
           closed my eyes, lowered my fork

         I’d hankered for that suckling pig
           but I tasted shrimp, and couldn’t renege

         Lightning didn’t strike me, I did a jig
           of the (shrimp) cocktail, I took a swig

         Upon awakening, my stomach was rent asunder
           Hmm. I'd evaded the lightning ~ but not the thunder 


         ____________________________________________
          Sometimes older Jews tell young'uns that if they eat
          pork, they'll be struck by lightning... Seems they 
          should mention shrimp and other non-kosher fare too!

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Michael Tor

Date: 11/21/2024 4:50:00 PM

Lol love your last line a classic Gershon. Thanks for the laugh...

Kim Rodrigues

Date: 11/21/2024 5:42:00 AM

Oh so interesting! What a great poem to tell the tale! Ineed to stop it with the sweet tooth…my downfall of late. Hugs - hope that’s aloud :)

Evelyn Judy Buehler

Date: 11/20/2024 6:19:00 PM

We all must face food temptations, Gershon. I enjoyed having a laugh today. :D

David Fisher

Date: 11/19/2024 5:50:00 PM

This is so well written, Gershon. And the last line was a poetic dessert!

Gershon Wolf
Date: 11/19/2024 8:01:00 PM

Always room for dessert -- actually 'Jello' -- as they sed to say. Thanks for the enthusiasm, David!

Terry Flood

Date: 11/19/2024 3:46:00 PM

Enjoyed the whole tale, GW, but that last line almost had me choking on my gin. almost, you understand… have you seen the price of gin? I know pigs have, for millennia, been considered filthy animals. Today, farming techniques mean that pork is homogenised within an inch of its flavour. I wonder whether the writers of religious doctrines would view pork more favourably, today. Go on… give your conscience a break!

Gershon Wolf
Date: 11/19/2024 8:09:00 PM

Ha, ha, ha! My father heard the same arguments in the 1930's. He invited himself to the nearest pig roast, got hit by lightning pronto, and... No, that would be too trite, eh?!... Anyway, I heard the same arguments again in the 1970's, but held my ground. ~ Thundering Thingamabobs and Great Big Greasy Grimy Gopher Guts

Paula Goldsmith

Date: 11/19/2024 10:15:00 AM

I enjoyed reading your creative/fun write. I hope no one gets hit by lightning. That would not be fun, they would be BBQ. How do you eat bacon/eggs/toast everyday & be kosher??? A friend did it for years. Now dead... Have a fun day as you write away..................

Gershon Wolf
Date: 11/19/2024 8:11:00 PM

Yor friend was about as kosher as Mike Tyson is Eskimo. (Mike's not In-tu-it. lol). Grinning, as Terry advertised! :) gw

Terry Flood
Date: 11/19/2024 3:49:00 PM

Paula, I don’t know if your ‘now dead’ comment was a statement of fact or a witticism… either way it gave me an irreverent giggle. I suspect GW will get a grin out of it too. Many thanks! Terry