Gershon Wolf Poet Couplet

Lightning Bolts and All That Stuff

 ~ A Lighthearted Look at Cheating on Keeping Kosher ~

         Pick my poison, shrimp or pork
           closed my eyes, lowered my fork

         I’d hankered for that suckling pig
           but I tasted shrimp, and couldn’t renege

         Lightning didn’t strike me, I did a jig
           of the (shrimp) cocktail, I took a swig

         Upon awakening, my stomach was rent asunder
           Hmm. I'd evaded the lightning ~ but not the thunder 


         ____________________________________________
          Sometimes older Jews tell young'uns that if they eat
          pork, they'll be struck by lightning... Seems they 
          should mention shrimp and other non-kosher fare too!

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Michael Tor November 21, 2024 at 4:50 PM Lol love your last line a classic Gershon. Thanks for the laugh...

Kim Rodrigues November 21, 2024 at 5:42 AM Oh so interesting! What a great poem to tell the tale! Ineed to stop it with the sweet tooth…my downfall of late. Hugs - hope that’s aloud :)

Evelyn Judy Buehler November 20, 2024 at 6:19 PM We all must face food temptations, Gershon. I enjoyed having a laugh today. :D

David Fisher November 19, 2024 at 5:50 PM This is so well written, Gershon. And the last line was a poetic dessert! Gershon Wolf November 19, 2024 at 8:01 PM Always room for dessert -- actually 'Jello' -- as they sed to say. Thanks for the enthusiasm, David!

Terry Flood November 19, 2024 at 3:46 PM Enjoyed the whole tale, GW, but that last line almost had me choking on my gin. almost, you understand… have you seen the price of gin? I know pigs have, for millennia, been considered filthy animals. Today, farming techniques mean that pork is homogenised within an inch of its flavour. I wonder whether the writers of religious doctrines would view pork more favourably, today. Go on… give your conscience a break! Gershon Wolf November 19, 2024 at 8:09 PM Ha, ha, ha! My father heard the same arguments in the 1930's. He invited himself to the nearest pig roast, got hit by lightning pronto, and... No, that would be too trite, eh?!... Anyway, I heard the same arguments again in the 1970's, but held my ground. ~ Thundering Thingamabobs and Great Big Greasy Grimy Gopher Guts

Paula Goldsmith November 19, 2024 at 10:15 AM I enjoyed reading your creative/fun write. I hope no one gets hit by lightning. That would not be fun, they would be BBQ. How do you eat bacon/eggs/toast everyday & be kosher??? A friend did it for years. Now dead... Have a fun day as you write away.................. Gershon Wolf November 19, 2024 at 8:11 PM Yor friend was about as kosher as Mike Tyson is Eskimo. (Mike's not In-tu-it. lol). Grinning, as Terry advertised! :) gw Terry Flood November 19, 2024 at 3:49 PM Paula, I don’t know if your ‘now dead’ comment was a statement of fact or a witticism… either way it gave me an irreverent giggle. I suspect GW will get a grin out of it too. Many thanks! Terry

John Read November 19, 2024 at 7:43 AM I'm not a lover of meat fish is my favourite dish, love your great sense of humour Gershon, have a lovely evening. Gershon Wolf November 19, 2024 at 8:20 PM Thanks for the compliment, John. Write on! :) gw

Tom Cunningham November 19, 2024 at 6:12 AM Never mind the preservatives and all the other crap they put in our food. Tom Captcha was YUK. Lol Gershon Wolf November 19, 2024 at 8:23 PM Thanks for the giggle, Tom! ~ Orky-Pay Ig-Pay (Master of Classical Pig-Latin)

Mike Gentile November 19, 2024 at 4:16 AM Love this one GW, your humor is always a pleasure to read! And then the "thunder"! Left me with a good laugh! Happy Tuesday !! Gershon Wolf November 19, 2024 at 8:32 PM Keep chortling, MG!

Chris Conn November 19, 2024 at 12:54 AM Pigs are to be avoided,period; as with all "bottom feeders." Gershon Wolf November 19, 2024 at 8:32 PM Aw, even Petunia Pig, my personal heartthrob? lol. :) gw