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Notes About The Poem

Form J Jueju (untraditional) Poetry Contest Sponsored by Constance la France 10/07/24

free image from pixabay.com

 

life after death

Ken's had a car accident
his life hangs in the balance
there’s no brain activity
his life support was switched off

declared clinically dead
Dee cradled him tenderly
as he took his final breath
their wedding vows remembered

donor card activated
vital organs are removed
saving the lives of others
even in death he lives on

Dee walks behind Ken’s coffin
her long ebony tresses
cover her face like a veil
mourner’s eyes glisten with tears

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Andrea Dietrich Date: 12/9/2024 7:30:00 AM Gosh I had not seen this earlier. Last verse is so heartbreaking. Login to Reply

Constance La France Date: 11/13/2024 11:45:00 AM Jan, congrats on your win in my contest, like the image, like the poem, well done, love Constance Login to Reply

Michael Tor Date: 11/4/2024 6:49:00 PM Just wonderfully penned Jan. Heartfelt piece that probably happened in truth somewhere out there. Thank you for sharing. Hugs... Login to Reply

Paul Callus Date: 10/27/2024 4:16:00 AM Beautiful and yet so sad, Jan. Yours is a topic that many more people need to get acquainted with...giving others a second chance to live. ~ Hugs // paul Login to Reply

Paula Goldsmith Date: 10/17/2024 10:14:00 AM Congratulations on your win. I enjoyed reading your wonderful yet sad write. Great Picture... I also like humor the best but sometimes a different write can be good. Have a wonderful day with your win.......................... Login to Reply

Ink Empress Date: 10/16/2024 7:25:00 AM Dear jan, this is so poignant and heart wrenching, i felt so many emotions reading this jueju! Youv written very well and did an excellent job! Congratulations also on winning. Sending you light Login to Reply

Kim Rodrigues Date: 10/15/2024 6:23:00 AM Truly sad! Some endure such terrible things. Great poetry. Great imagery at the end. Login to Reply

Sara Kendrick Date: 10/12/2024 11:36:00 AM Congratulations on your winning work in Constance's contest. I can feel the pain that the poem records. Way to go. Thank you for sharing your talent with us. Sara K Login to Reply

thriveni c mysore Date: 10/11/2024 10:13:00 PM Congratulations on your win dear poet. Login to Reply

Tania Kitchin Date: 10/10/2024 3:34:00 AM Jan, a great emotive poem, best of luck in the contest. Hugs Login to Reply

Arthur Vaso Date: 10/9/2024 11:03:00 PM Another beautifully woven poem Lin, oh.......... wait a sec this is Jan!!!!! Login to Reply Lin Lane Date: 10/10/2024 8:28:00 AM lo Art, you are such a jokester to do this to both of us. She hasn't read it yet, so she's not in on the joke. Love it!

Len Gasun Date: 10/9/2024 10:34:00 PM A beautifully sad poem that carried me away my dearest poet friend Jan. I'm deeply moved and touched by the story and picture painted by your creative words and poem form, jeiju. Thank you so much for sharing your wonderful talent in poetry, not only writing stellar poems that make us laugh but cry. God bless you always and your writings. Hugs Login to Reply

Mike Gentile Date: 10/9/2024 6:02:00 AM A side of jan I have not seen is presented here so rich in deep emotion! You talent I well respect Jan, I am moved!! A Happy Tuesday to you xxoo Login to Reply

Anisha Dutta Date: 10/9/2024 12:39:00 AM Your illustration and feeling to move every reader's heart. To live with different lives is great. You have analysed from a specific angle. I got charmed. Love. Login to Reply

Duke Beaufort Date: 10/8/2024 3:54:00 PM Jan, a story well told in a fairly brief manner. It moves right along and hits home. Death is a tough subject, but you are a master! Login to Reply

John Read Date: 10/8/2024 9:18:00 AM Good luck in the contest Jan, what happened to your sense of humour lol.xx Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 10/8/2024 9:34:00 AM i wrote 2 funny poems yesterday John, one is for the book, the other was the silly one about a hat. I do surprise people and write the occasional serious poem but humour is always my favourite. hugs jan xx

Hilda Greenhough Date: 10/7/2024 7:54:00 PM This is a sad poem but it is many poems. A man dies. A woman must cope. The deceased man's organs live on in other's lives. When we touch another, some reaction occurs. My mind is stimulated by this poem. Thank you for sharing this. Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 10/8/2024 7:09:00 AM thanks Hilda:-) I dont often write dark poetry I much prefer humour but am not posting it on soup as I'm saving it for my next book:-) hugs Jan xx

Michael Tor Date: 10/7/2024 4:33:00 PM Heartfelt Jan. Your words created sympathy and sorrow toward the wife. Well written. Hugs... Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 10/8/2024 7:07:00 AM thanks Michael, I seldom write dark poetry like this I much prefer humour in fact yesterday I wrote this poem, another farty poem destined for the book, and a funny poem for a contest. I never know where my muse will take me or when! hugs Jan xx

Joanne Mobley Date: 10/7/2024 3:49:00 PM i cried reading this such a tragic way to go hope your at peace joanne x Login to Reply

Lin Lane Date: 10/7/2024 3:22:00 PM That's a 'boo hoo' story, Jan but tastefully done. Login to Reply Lin Lane Date: 10/10/2024 8:29:00 AM Oh no, you're not. Just because I wrote a funny, stinky one and Jan wrote a serious one, you will never confuse the two of us. Hugs, sweet friend. Arthur Vaso Date: 10/9/2024 11:05:00 PM Your both confusing me now!!! LOL Jan Allison Date: 10/7/2024 3:23:00 PM thanks Lin i wrote this at the same time as the mouse poem - talk about going from one extreme to another, also did another poem for the book but the theme was one i had to do lol:-) hugs jan xx