Lie To Live
You ask for the truth
How can I tell when I can’t differentiate between the truth and lies
I’ve created a world in which I somehow can find tolerance to live in
For myself, a simple way to be able to breathe
The rest I keep bottled up inside
I speak my heart; but you don’t hear my words anymore
I tell the truth; you don’t seem to care
Living a farce seems to be the only way to survive
For such a long time I longed, I hoped
Until there was no hope left, only lies
I kept telling; you didn’t’ register anymore
I struggled to breathe; choking in lies
Slowly falling apart; bit by bit
Until nothing was left
I couldn’t recognize myself anymore
Couldn’t see the truth in living
No use in pretending anymore
This wall I built around me, became my salvation
It’s become my saving grace; lie to live
The only way I knew how to survive this
After all that’s been said and done in the past now
I turn my collar to the wind; trying to forgive, to forget
Turning to face an uncertain future
I’m so afraid, fear choking me
All I ask is to release me, to set me free
Wanting to break free, needing to regain myself
Longing to breathe without barriers
Begging for mercy, for some understanding
I see the hurt and anger in your eyes
Tears roll down my cheeks too, I’m not unscaved
As I walk away, it’s the last time I’ll apologize
You saw my demons, you knew my weakness
But it was all too much, you chose to walk away
All is left is emptiness around my heart
Hurt, loneliness, sadness and pain
I don’t want to live in any shadow anymore
No more lies, only truth
No more tears, only joy
No more anger, only peace
No more lying to live
For the last time I’m breaking this chain
A lightness surrounding my being
Somehow I don’t care anymore
Freedom of my past, freedom of my demons, sadness and anger
You’ll never hurt me again
Finally I’m free to live my live
Living for the truth, only the truth from now on
Copyright © Yolanda Wessels | Year Posted 2015
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