Lately

I opened my eyes today Sleepless slumber entangling me Severing dreams from reality Memories like rewinding a tape Forever lost in thought For I lament my loss Never again will I learn to walk Held so high above the earth Soaring above the pavement chalk Never again will I feel that embrace Warm arms to hold me tight A gentle hand to soothe my pace Ive tried to breath lately Patient breathes invite coughs Skipping reduced to a mere crawling pace I open my eyes and there lies your face No smile or tears Just your empty gaze tearing me apart For I loved you once for many years I can feel when you were gone For I myself have no more heart A loss of words, though many thoughts Forgive me father for I am lost I miss every little fight Whether mother or father, matters not To watch as faith was lost To hear your voice as it's now gone Weakening me by the minute For every hug I didnt want I need it now Though I lie barehanded I cant find that feeling of love One must wonder how The sound of those around me Their laughter eases my pain Then the following silence The coming rain I would never dare call one my friend For I have no right I would not dare bring unto them, my night When I hear their laugh I know I can heal them some For I wish I could love But like every morning sun My heart still withers My end still comes