Lapsed Sanity

I caress the black
 leaning into its soft
 velvet hold, hoping
 to blind the agony

but,
 the reflection of my sadness
 overwhelms and sickens
 I swallow nails with each gulp
 food carries the stench of death

uncaring of a torn psyche
 I continue to look back
 searching my mistakes
 rehashing every word

with each glance at our end
 a slice of sanity is lost
 and consistently shaking
 my anchor is breaking loose

I dream into nothingness
 becoming a lost beggar
 who can never come home
 for it is barren and bare

profound truth eludes me
 despair cloaks me in ashes
 as my sight ebbs to fade
 I begin to slide away 

I awake to each breathless day
 in the realm of the forgotten
 lying with the shredded ribbons
 of my love scattered to ground

this long endless night
 echoes with silent howls
 and the dripping tears
 bled from my crucified heart

in this self-made prison
 I am now living death alone
Copyright © | Year Posted 2014

Poem

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Goodson Avatar
February 14, 2014 at 11:56 AM
I must say how impressed I am of this poem. For anyone having never experienced a loss of a spouse or close friend, This poem helps to give an understanding of what such loss means to the soul left behind. My hat is off to you for giving me a poetic means of understanding.
Eggins Avatar
February 15, 2014 at 6:17 AM
My loss is very recent and so still vey painful its not a death but it may as well be, I am so very happy that I conveyed my feelings across the page love Jayne x
Onclaud Avatar
February 12, 2014 at 12:57 PM
a slow-motion of expression simmering inside yet bursting with poetic energy.. wat depth and tonality, jayne.. much enjoyed!.. huggs
Eggins Avatar
February 15, 2014 at 6:19 AM
Nette this was written over the period of a few hours so that maybe where you are getting the slow motion build up I am very happy you enjoyed it love Jayne xxx
Dietrich Avatar
February 11, 2014 at 11:08 PM
Your writing is so mature! How long has it been since I first met you? did i meet you at Soup? I honestly can't remember and i am curious if i knew you from another poetry site earlier.
Eggins Avatar
February 15, 2014 at 6:21 AM
I think it was when I first started at the soup 4-5yrs ago not sure if you know me from another poetry site I am only a member of one other, that I wont mention here lol much love Jayne xxx
Melugin Avatar
February 11, 2014 at 11:18 AM
Dear Jayne! 7 teary stars! You do sad......sooo good! Your pen cries with expressive pain inspired by brokenness! Your style is stellar. Love, chuck
Eggins Avatar
February 15, 2014 at 6:22 AM
Chuck your comment brought a huge smile to my face thank you so much for that love Jayne x
Kendrick Avatar
February 11, 2014 at 10:36 AM
Enjoyed reading your very expressive work this morning..It is very emotive and creative..I hope just a write and not a recent happening...Thanks for the visits to my page..I was delighted to see you there..Sara
Eggins Avatar
February 15, 2014 at 6:23 AM
Sara its always a pleasure to read your work, unfortunately this is a recent happening as with a lot of my poetry lately its autobiographical big hugs Jayne x
Moore Avatar
February 11, 2014 at 7:00 AM
Sad but beautiful
Eggins Avatar
February 11, 2014 at 7:11 AM
Thanks Cathy, sad to say its a true story thanks for the read its much appreciated :) love Jayne x
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