Karen's Brother

Sky blue eyes looking past the bounty of pork rinds past boundless skylines stare blankly for way too long then to the menu cradled in his plastic hands. Plant-based food options required by government mandate appear first photographed in black and white described vapidly with Century Gothic font. Unappetizing, as you might well imagine. Non-plant-based options sumptuously depicted in magnificent grand holographic splendor enabling them to leap vividly from the page and seduce you like shade to a vampire. The spirit animal of he who stares blankly is the fierce and the mighty hippopotamus and thus is terminally offended by cooked animal flesh and other parts. Raging victimhood requires a revamped menu, “Personalized, with all plant-based options sumptuously depicted in magnificent grand holographic splendor enabling them to jump vividly from the page and seduce you like shade to a vampire.” Supervisor Bob arrives. "Got a problem here? It's my fault. Everything sucks." This customer who never ever would be right was treated as if he was right and then ordered “Corn Flakes (brand only) with soy milk, no Styrofoam.” The dark clouds parted, and the sun broke through. Ill will was suppressed and hearts rejoiced at the impending parting of ways. False gratitude gushed when anguish waned. Later when sympathetic ears were near, complaints were loud with each retelling “…you literally won’t believe what they said next…”