It's Only Six Months 'Til Christmas

Only six months 'til Christmas... Yes, just six months to go- I'd best start making lists, Buying bottles for' ‘rellies' who like to get pissed And scouring for bargains at Tesco. Only six months since the last one And I've just finished paying the bills- The credit card's clear (Like that barrel of beer), And I feel a bit green 'round the gills. I'd better start writing cards soon; (It’s much harder nearer the time) But I just hope nobody dies: Last year I sent Brenda's too early, And her wake got quite a surprise: Reading cards by the coffin, Expecting sombre tones, It said "Hope you get drunk And make whoopee with Dunk! " P.s. You know how to have a good time!' It's only six months 'til Christmas. I hardly remember why We prepare for so long, Get stressed when it goes wrong It makes me just want to cry! It's six months since the last one And I forgot to send the socks to Uncle John. I found them in the drawer, Stuck right near the floor. Never mind, I'll re-wrap them anon. I know I sound like a miser And it's the season of generosity, But it's hard to be carefree When I can only shop at Aldi And my income is almost all gone. This year I promise to be More organised, Thoughtful and full of good cheer. Well... promises are made to be broken. And anyway, there's always NEXT year! Copyright Emily Joshua