It's Done

when my life is done i assume my soul or immaterial part of my being, will leave the physical structure of bones and flesh as the two part will i have a chance to look at myself see who i was or as someone i never got to know or will they be the same i’ve never been comfortable in my own skin literally and figuratively mostly overweight, rarely fit and never skinny insecure often reticent to express how i really feel, what will i look like tomorrow in some sort of box, whole en route to a hole or reduced to ashes spread on the ocean or in an urn, on a mantel will i feel disconnected more so than in life unable to communicate unable to be understood did i make good use of my time who decides that anyway right now, today, i regret little i believe every action in life led me to where i am right now, today, i am mostly satisfied but is satisfied enough would i do my life over if i had the chance, and if so, would i change anything what if i found out this is as good as it gets