It Can'T Be Real

A truth in rage of insult furrows my mind For it is only an offense given to me by myself In the mouths of others far innocent than I I feel the tears trickle down my cheeks For I have surfaced into an ugly mistake I am always inadequate in this brain I try to shine like the advice of grace given But confidence rarely rears its head my way There’s a sort of shade blocking its way A shade that darkens everyday That very shade led me to believe my feelings are wrong That I will never belong so long as they are not controlled I must be careful—for the lines of love and lust run cold I hate myself truly this night And no one but myself will give me the right The very right to degrade my every being Because you are not seeing what I am seeing There is no point My lines run cold Can I be so bold as to say I still love with a pang of indistinguishable doubt All feelings enter in As my truth blurs and checks out Your words pierce me so deep I cannot describe the pain I feel God it hurts so bad It can’t be real Much like the love I have come to embrace The very love that links to your face Tears don’t give it justice It can’t be real Much like the love I will never face