Inside Outside

Outside the crimson pout is not me and my soul denies the mascaraed lashes while an imitation smile hides tears within the pseudo echo of myself a shadow with painted lips that say the right words and my spirit stays silent and broken inside Inside I hear you calling my name but it can never be mine you call me she but I am he and the boy cries into the silence while my eyes look for answers outside Outside alcohol, drugs, sex and self-hate no answers came no words of comfort in the endless night as I hear him cry and feel his pain inside Inside and outside in disarray no balance of mind as the tears washed away the painted shadows of self like the rain in a storm until nothing remains but him inside, outside the same © JG Farmer 2017