Inner Demons

Inner Demons I stumble in the darkness. my hands flung wide in mindless panic. I grasp for something, anything, but find only empty space and I begin to fall. I crash against the floor and pain sears through my weakened body I cry out in fear, and anguish, terrified amidst this eternal night. I lie in the blackness and hear voices around me, soft insistent, never ending they scorn me, berate me, abuse me. They are the sounds of my guilt, my arrogance in believing myself to be right. They deride my very existence They flay my soul with their accusations. I close my eyes to them, but still they call. I retreat far inside myself, but still they follow. They pursue me as a hound seeks its quarry until finally I turn at bay and face them. Theses are the terrors of my waking world. The memories and crimes I have locked away. They are the truths that we all must face, and in facing we will either be made whole or rent asunder. I see them as ravening beasts, hungry for blood. I have no weapons, no way of defense They stalk towards me, so sure of the kill and I fall to my knees in resignation. It is as they fall upon me that I see a way through and my head snaps up, my eyes gleaming I open my arms to the jaws of insanity and bare my soul to their judgement. There is pain and there is dreadful horror, There is self-loathing and bitter abhorrence. But there is grateful acceptance loving forgiveness as the darkness breaks before me and I am flooded with the light. 18 November, 1999acb