In Praise of Women

In Praise of Women By Elton Camp How thankful I am for womankind Who for bearing babies are designed If all us men could the same to do There might be one, but never two It’s a thought I cannot abide Having another person inside To think you, for months, are fated To wake up each morning nauseated There’s nothing to do but to understand For most of a year your waist will expand And when about halfway done Baby starts to have much fun He must think it’s quite a trick To give his mother a hard kick And still bigger, bigger grows he Till mother out of balance will be Atop her bladder he does perch Up and down he likes to lurch To the bathroom she has to go Most every time the kid does so If a baby stood on my bladder It would be a serious matter It wouldn’t be very neat Being stomped by his feet Then the baby begins to knock at the door “You can’t keep me inside here anymore.” Female pelvis is made quite wide Between the bones baby can slide Daddy’s broad at shoulder and narrow at hip So there’s not enough room for a baby to slip So the main thing I want to say “For women give a big hooray!”