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I'll Be Here All Week

*And then, I am finally free from house arrest 
- Which is better news for me than it is for you and your family*

...I am bloodletting
All of my frustration
With a wee-bit 
Of Danbert Nobacon...

...This is what usually happens:
Whenever someone listens 
To the "Unfairy Tale" LP
While sensually drunk 
On homemade LSD...

?...This is also how 
I mistakenly met 
George Harrison 
And Graham Chapman 
While undertaking 
My most recently failed suicide attempt....
...And both they, and Lenny Bruce agreed: 
I probably should have aimed to succeed
If I really wanted anybody 
To ever take my career in comedy 
Any more seriously 
Than my 'highly-underrated' 
Criminal record...
"...Whatever..." I calmly stated 
Before soundly adding 
For all intents and purposes:
"Everyone always neglects to mention:
My criminal record 
Has already gone 
Triple platinum 
In Japan and Sudan"

Copyright © | Year Posted 2016

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