If You Could Be An Animal

If you could be an animal, Which one would it be? Which one shares your personality? Would you be mammal, or amphibian, Perhaps a reptile, or a fowl, The strength and memory of an elephant, Or the wisdom of an owl? Or maybe one that science says is probably A branch upon our family tree? It's anthropologists' contention That the simian's most like us, Though that theory's raised an awful lot of dust. They cite the chimpanzee, especially, As being anything but dumb, He has a brain as big as ours And an opposable thumb. Of course, if being a monkey's cousin makes you cuss, Blame Charlie Darwin for the fuss. Or maybe you'd select a species That's endangered or extinct, Each few years the list is adding one or two. But we'll keep chopping down their habitats To put up shopping malls, Apartment homes, and parking lots, 'til one day it befalls The ones who're left Will dwindle down to just a few, And they'll be living in a zoo. Evolution proves we're better off As the species that we are, There's no need to alter chromosomes or genes. But as the human population here Continues to explode, And unless somebody figures How the excess to unload, Then it won't matter who we know Or what our means, We'll have no choice but be sardines.