I Stand Alone

What you see is a hollow shell, Inside I stand alone in my private hell. My pain is something I try to hide, It is kept locked deep inside. No one to talk to about my morbid thought, Nor anyone to care nor anyone that can be sought. On my face you will see a smile, But inside I have been hurting all the while. I have sisters who I love dearly, But lines between us have been drawn clearly. I have friends, a very a select few, But they have their own problems they are going through. I hate to be an obligation. What I would give not to have that sensation. I want to be asked about in genuine concern, Not because you see me as problem to discern. I know these issues are mine and mine alone, However it would be nice for someone to just phone. To ask how I am really feeling, And not take the crap that I have been speeling! I want someone just once to say That they thought of me today. That they want to know what way went by, That caused me to lose the twinkle in my eye. I ask about everyone because I truly care, But feel like I am not really all there. Is it too much to ask For someone to forget about the past? I know that most of this is my own making, But it is still real, there is no faking. One day I hope to have that sparkle back. But 'til then I remain still at the end of the pack. Still a hollow shell, Still alone in my own private hell.