I Should Have Held My Breath

You were gone as quickly as you appeared. One moment you were walking back into my life, a bit more weathered, much more grey, but you still had those eyes that saw right through me. You stood there as I fumbled for the words to say after 8 long years and before I could catch my breath, I felt every moment I had gone without you melt away. Like watching an old home video, the nostalgia washed over me like a tidal wave and just like that, I felt the warm edges of love in my chest. You would think it would be uncomfortable or awkward to love again so suddenly, so forcefully, yet I stood steadfast with belief in you once again. Years of conditioning a cold heart, forgotten in an instant. You made me feel a joy and an electricity that I no longer felt was in my grasp. And as quickly as you walked through the doors you turned and left again. You were a tornado of emotion that destroyed every wall I built up around me. You came and you took and you left. They tell me it’s better sooner than later but I wonder if this kind of pain can grow any wider in my chest. I could have held my breath longer than you stayed, and dear god I wish I had.