I Remember

I still remember The girl you flirted with When we went on a break And weren’t seeing other people. Your friend told me You were out on dates With your ex Baby momma. (She took your profile pic I used to stare at forever.) He sent me the voice note, Where the girl explained. Said you walked her to the car, And used the line. I didn’t know it was a line Until she said it too. ‘You’re so beautiful, It’s distracting.’ What bull that was, And I fell for it. You may have forgotten her, But I never did. I looked up her account And tried to figure out why. I’d look for your ex And stare at the pictures. See how you made All the effort for her. I’d search them continuously, And look at the girls Your friend told me you flirted with Behind my back. I’d stare at their pictures And compare myself to them, Wonder why I Was never good enough For you. I cried myself to sleep Each day and night. I was never going to be The one you wanted. If you didn’t up With your ex the way you did, I know if it came down, It’d be her over me. For you, I was never enough. And I realize it now. Just because We never spoke about it anymore Didn’t mean the past Was gone from our lives. It lingered in the air, It never went away. I only ignored it Because I knew you wouldn’t talk about it. I still remember And I’ll never forget. Here’s to me breaking the habit Of typing their names Into search bars And comparing myself To girls who Would never give you The time of day.