I Haint Donning Royal Carpet Treatment

I haint donning royal carpet treatment No stuntman/woman showed up, albeit intervened in timely fashion to thwart mishaps experienced courtesy me I bemoan, and poet lore re: yet of Perkiomen Valley Pennsylvania, United States of America never suffered major illness nor broken bone (specifically life and death health crisis, nor compound fracture respectively) cuz guardian angel intervened, though aim of mine heretofore forthwith literary endeavor merely expressing, exhibiting, examining... a painfully bodily mishap, where Lady Luck gussied up as crone perhaps female spirit of Matthew Scott Harris in the guise of wizened older woman himself affecting doppelganger as grotesquely personified... well lemme cease written jibber jabber without rhyme nor reason nor sense and sensibility analogous to being subjected to annoying drone and describe and elucidate how stunted man (me) amazingly graceful, nevertheless, yours truly accident prone The following bonafide poem fleshed out ~ October 2019 I did accidently revisit painfully suffering with silent true grit. Aw shucks, I did sustain moderately serious injury series of unfortunate events ludicrous and quite insane, yours truly did previously explain while crouching (think Tony as papier mâché Tiger), aye fell backward, where sharp desktop corner didst train ground zero right side rib cage domain punched thru L.L. Bean Autumn jacket zapped, tattooed, lacerated... bloodstain proof positive bow tocks sing arrowing, fletching, notching, piercing, searing targeting ... pain prestidigitation went awry courtesy "fake" legerdemain, yours truly incapacitated plain vanilla and simple found me mortally slain, more tortuous than spelunking thru eye of needle size tunnel, no bigger than sand grain, and/or trumpeted by suzerain arrogant, boastful, contemptuous... arid, barren, cerebrally desolate brain, a definitive liability, (not just from Ukraine stormy din yelled brouhaha), profane but..., I wholeheartedly ascertain, the former commander in chief an absolute zero inane purpose twittering acrimonious, disdain calamitous, egregious, gangrenous..., arcane rumbustious, venomous, zealous... carte blanche bigoted, misogynistic, racist..., inhumane blathering, excoriating, insulting... seeding, planting, muckraking... dogbane demanding obeisance till germane henchmen verstehen unwittingly declaring himself jejune bloodhound August huss preening, primping, proofing orange-blond mane more attentive to applying gray matter to strain Midas coated self important fiery propane verbal quid pro quo explosions inevitably spray'n, nothing but antisemitism, barbarism, demagoguery, hatred... diatribes roiling the masses til rabid rantings attain intolerant decibel threshold usurping totalitarian refrain.