I Felt Pretty

I woke up today, to chaos and expectations, and demands. my heart began pounding and I threw up my defenses. Walls erected a million miles high above me I can finally breathe. I get dressed, and for the first time in a long time I felt pretty today. You were kind to me, and for a short time, I felt safe. Then it came as it always does You call it a joke.. as I feel the agony of my heart being broke again. It shatters into a million pieces. The pain was so much and I opened up, I told you How badly I hurt and the darkness that lives inside of me and immediately.... chaos expectations demands threats guilt. and I throw back up my defenses, But I'm already broken again. So I sit alone and self medicate. as always, whiskey helps drown my pain I felt pretty today.