I Constantly Pay

WAKING TO A NEW WORLD OF CHANGE AND HAVING TO ACCEPT IT AS IT COMES IS ONE OF THE SCARIEST THINGS I HAVE DONE SINCE THE DAY I WAS BORN ONE DAY I AM ACTIVE AND STRONG THE NEXT I AM SOME THING I HAVE NOT KNOWN EVEN THOUGH I HAVE SEEN THIS LIFE BEFORE WHEN I WAS STILL YOUNG IT LEAVES ME FEELING SCARED AND ALONE NO MATTER HOW MANY PEOPLE I AM AROUND IT TAKES SOME THING FROM ME AND I HATE THIS DISEASE THAT WAS GIVEN TO ME ANOTHER CHALLENGE I KNOW A TRIAL IN LIFE I HAVE TO GET BY WITH OUT FALLING TO THE GROUND IN DEFEAT I STAND AND FIGHT WHAT HURTS WITH IN ME IT'S HARD FOR SOME TO UNDERSTAND AND THEY FEAR TO BE AROUND ME AND THAT IS OKAY WITH ME FOR I AM SCARED AS WELL YOU SEE I HAVE NO CHOICE OF WHAT I AM TODAY IT'S SOME THING THAT IS MEANT TO BE AND THIS I UNDERSTAND IN MANY WAYS IT'S A PART OF THE LIFE I WAS GIVEN YESTERDAY FROM ALL THE YEARS OF ABUSE OF ALCOHOL AND DRUGS DOING THINGS I SHOULD HAVE REFRAINED FROM WHILE I WAS STILL YOUNG I DIS-OBEYED MY DAD AND MOM BROKE THE RULES OF SOCIETY COMMITTED CRIMES FOR FUN AND EVEN SPENT ELEVEN MONTHS ON THE RUN TO ONLY LEARN THERE IS NO ESCAPE CAUSE SOONER OR LATER YOU'LL PAY AND TODAY I CONSTANTLY PAY A PRICE FOR HOW I WAS YESTERDAY