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I Constantly Pay

WAKING TO A NEW WORLD OF CHANGE
AND HAVING TO ACCEPT IT AS IT COMES
IS ONE OF THE SCARIEST THINGS I HAVE DONE
SINCE THE DAY  I WAS BORN

ONE DAY I AM ACTIVE AND STRONG
THE NEXT I AM SOME THING I HAVE NOT KNOWN
EVEN THOUGH I HAVE SEEN THIS LIFE BEFORE
WHEN I WAS STILL YOUNG

IT LEAVES ME FEELING SCARED AND ALONE
NO MATTER HOW MANY PEOPLE  I AM AROUND
IT TAKES SOME THING FROM ME
AND I HATE THIS DISEASE THAT WAS GIVEN TO ME

ANOTHER CHALLENGE I KNOW
A TRIAL IN LIFE I HAVE TO GET BY
WITH OUT FALLING TO THE GROUND IN DEFEAT
I STAND AND FIGHT WHAT HURTS WITH IN ME

IT'S HARD FOR SOME TO UNDERSTAND 
AND THEY FEAR TO BE AROUND ME
AND THAT IS OKAY WITH ME
FOR I AM SCARED AS WELL YOU SEE

I HAVE NO CHOICE OF WHAT I AM TODAY
IT'S SOME THING THAT IS MEANT TO BE
AND THIS I UNDERSTAND IN MANY WAYS
IT'S A PART OF THE LIFE I WAS GIVEN YESTERDAY

FROM ALL THE YEARS OF ABUSE
OF ALCOHOL AND DRUGS
DOING THINGS I SHOULD HAVE REFRAINED FROM
WHILE I WAS STILL YOUNG

I DIS-OBEYED MY DAD AND MOM
BROKE THE RULES OF SOCIETY
COMMITTED CRIMES FOR FUN
AND EVEN SPENT ELEVEN MONTHS ON THE RUN

TO ONLY LEARN THERE IS NO ESCAPE
CAUSE SOONER OR LATER YOU'LL PAY
AND TODAY I CONSTANTLY PAY A PRICE
FOR HOW I WAS YESTERDAY

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Red Fiery

Date: 1/11/2012 8:23:00 AM

once we realize something then the road to improvement is nt that far,,,my dear Noel , i feel for all these lines u have written, My wishes for u ...always...cheers !

Noel Potter
Date: 1/11/2012 10:07:00 AM

my whole life i have paid for mistakes and i grew tired of that same ole same ole thing,,so one day i sat down and looked back on my path and found a reason to erase what i had created and painted in my life that i dreamed of and left the sad and bad out for another day ,,, in a lot of my writes you will see this process

Noel Potter
Date: 1/11/2012 10:05:00 AM

true, i think of my writings as painting pictures with words, no matter what we do it is always up to us to paint that life we want to live and to ensure that we follow the right path in life to gain the most from what we do and see on our journey,, the paint brush i hold in my hand paints the life i left behind and the one ahead,so i can learn from the past to gain ground in my future