I Confess I Am Guilty

When I was just seven, so small My best friend Jacob, outdid us all He had a pet Cobra, cool as could be He forgot to feed it for a whole week you see So I killed him When I was fourteen, I went to the zoo So many animals, all lounging around Some seemed starved and some seemed week One poor zebra died right on its feet So I killed a Zookeeper When I was twenty one I met a young blonde We dated and loved and times where great Her pet Collie so youthful with such playful traits She left him in the car, the heat at one hundred and eight So I killed my girlfriend I am older now, a full mature twenty eight My neighbor Miss Jennings has a cat we call him Mate He loves all the felines all over the town Till Miss Jennings had him neutered the Mate is down So I killed Miss Jennings Now I am thirty five and working so hard At the animal shelter as the night guard They bring in the wounded, the week and defenseless All these humans who treat pets with out any senses So I killed few strangers who mistreated pets I am forty-two and work for the park Where they come every day walking their pets after dark In leashes so tight and bound round the neck How is the good? Oh what the heck So I killed all of them too Now I am forty nine and in county jail For some serial crimes they accuse me of committing All I did was love animals, who are they kidding? I am the hero in this story you all must see? So I escaped and killed the jailor and now I am free I have read the local papers; I am on the front page They want to put me in a prison cage Oh and there is PETA, who claim me as Saint I am so proud why I might almost faint But I kill myself as my final act To be with the animals I loved till the last