I Am Supposed To Be a Human Being
I had a happy childhood at first
Yeah I played with dolls to a tragic
Extent. It was a dream of some
Type of female existence. I was
Almost to young to remember the
Two year old boy I used to be.
I had memories of another me.
I began to realize, as I heard
Relatives arguing about a little
Girl. "No she is a boy!" "She
Should wear boy clothes, why do
You buy her dresses!" I wondered
Who could they be arguing about
Then I recognized, it was me!
That is why I often sought boy
Company. I didn't give a DAMN
What the doctors said. Yeah!
In my head I was the one my
DEAD BLACK FATHER'S SON!
I was a dream in my own reality
Supreme!! In somebody else's
World, to them I was just a
Little black girl but... I knew the
Truth. Someone had ripped my
Genitalia! Made me unnatural
An abomination! My dreams
My aspirations. A failure!
My ANATOMY!! was my destiny
Now to bleed? Between my legs
Was a lie. Mutilation! I was a
Little girl? I cried, I wanted to
Become the man that I am!
That my father was. He loved!
I thought who had committed
This atrocity against me. My
Mind screamed. WHERE IS MY
BOY ANATOMY!!
This was traumatic. As I grew I,
In 1980 or maybe 1992 I knew.
I was a man without my life no
Longer between my legs. So
What did this make me? Somebody
Have carved me a Man-made
Anatomy. Making me a gender
Bender?! This SHOULD NOT BE!!
A TRANSGENDER ATROCITY!!
I AM A MAN!! WITHOUT MY
DNA PLAN!!
OH DAMN!! This will not stand!
I feel as though I am the only one.
My dead black father's
GENDERLESS SON. No synthetic
Hormones man made Testosterone
I have got my own. YESSS! I AM
A MAN! THEY named me
VALERIE on the surgeon's table.
But I grew regardless of what
Anybody else wanted. I would
Become my own reality.
Knowbody will control this angry
Man. No transgender rhetoric no
Bible beliefs. please. I am nobody's
Woman. I am the unapologetic
Nonconforming supposed to be
Wants to be like my forefathers.
All of those ANATOMICALLY
CORRECT MEN! I WANT TO BE
THEM!! Y- CHROMOSOME SEED
NO APOLOGIES!!
The definition of MANHOOD IS
to FIGHT against the ODDS no
Matter what!! I AM!!
Copyright © Val Brooklyn Rogers Blk Panther | Year Posted 2023
Post Comments
Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.
Please
Login
to post a comment