I Am Not Me

Gray sky’s warm tear drops sad heart 


Why do I cry on sight of a blue moon?


There are no flowers to soon to bloom


When is the sun going to shine? 


 Cloudy days bring rain to my
face 


No ray of hope to bring me out of my depression 


My sad eyes no longer smile can’t walk a mile 


As fast as I use too weak to run away 


Must face the noise in my head the tear drops 


Cloud my vision the sadness much too deep


To find myself to profound are the scares that I wear 


And the pain I can’t not bare to see myself in despair


Broken not ready to be spoken and fix 


What’s inside my head the scares have not heal


What I feel is lonely and sad who can I turn to 


Who can I trust to pick me up when I stumble and fall?


When those I trusted let me down believing all is fine


I wear the scares black and blue all up and down my arms


On a bad day silent tears comfort me 


I am a mire reflection of myself no longer fiscally strong


A reflection of past memories a stronger me happier days


One day at a time fills my days sadness concludes my nights 


Worry and despair takes my sleep weakness takes my energy 


Aim fading like in eraser used on a sheet of paper 


Where is my resolution my conclusion to my dilemma? 


Some might say feeling sorry for my self is too easy 


Not use to easy nothing came or comes easy in my life 


Still I manage to pick myself up not completely healed


  A mirror of scares reflection
of past times 


Fighting to get back what under the knife took from me 


Impossible time to move on easy said than done 


Half the person I use to be looks back at me where can I go   


When the black clouds fallow me trying to claim


Victory pill popping white coat visits 


Stress burning a hole in my head half the person I use to be 


A mere reflection looking back at me 


Where did I go that early December Morning? 


Love ones wait hours gone by to awake not the same 


But half the person I use to be no passion lights gone dim 


Still fighting to get back to myself and I separated 


By health related issues to deep to come back from

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