Get Your Premium Membership

Heart--Breaker

Poet's Notes
(Show)

Become a Premium Member and post notes and photos about your poem like Nette Onclaud.


 

                                Image result for lonely lovers parting

I feel your unrehearsed pauses--- the rustle of a blue shirt in leaving a tangy ache your lips make, holding back collected words. This rendezvous is a slow-fire quiver while the ending has it's own interment; and outside, our named tree wrestles with an insolent night... dew against my eyes, dry mouth licking an estranged bite that reminds me of your frivolity . Until whispers become hollow but solvent like a thirst from a weltering breakwall. So it is with discovery, the trails of affection is never mine as I call you wearily,' O heart-breaker’, while banging shells litter on the dunes. There is still much to learn about young passion... needles upon my chest, losing you from sight like a migrant breeze of time, for a woman so fragile at nineteen. 2/11/2017 Nicola Bryne’s You Broke My Heart Contest

Copyright © | Year Posted 2017




Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem.

Please Login to post a comment

Date: 2/16/2017 5:39:00 PM
Nette!! You are so wonderfully gifted!! Well done and congratulations!!! Big Hugggs deb:)
Login to Reply
Date: 2/15/2017 12:14:00 AM
What a poetic way to describe heart-breaking pain! Amazing, Nette:) congratulations:)
Login to Reply
Date: 2/14/2017 10:59:00 AM
Back with congratulations...
Login to Reply
Date: 2/14/2017 1:57:00 AM
Passion and insight, this is a very food poem. The migrant breeze of time and hollow whispers. Congratulation, Kai
Login to Reply
Date: 2/13/2017 5:27:00 PM
Congrats on your win, nette. What a marvelous poem full of great images.
Login to Reply
Date: 2/13/2017 4:46:00 PM
Poetic perfection. Congratulations. Well deserved placement.
Login to Reply
Date: 2/13/2017 3:39:00 PM
"Needles upon chest." Vivid painful imagery of a young love lost. Congratulations on your high placement.
Login to Reply
Date: 2/12/2017 1:23:00 AM
Beautifully crafted, Nette. Thank you for sharing. -- Wesley C.
Login to Reply
Date: 2/11/2017 7:28:00 PM
Nette - wow, what a great poem!! : )
Login to Reply
Date: 2/11/2017 1:52:00 PM
- Young hearts are very vulnerable ... her life is just starting ... - A wonderful poem, Nette - Luck in the contest - hugs // Anne-Lise :)
Login to Reply
Date: 2/11/2017 12:50:00 PM
So well written Nette, best wishes in the contest...
Login to Reply
Date: 2/11/2017 11:20:00 AM
Haunting emotions, at least as i read, and captured with such impact. You start and end this exceptional poem with an air of nostalgia---darn unforgettable!
Login to Reply
Date: 2/11/2017 11:17:00 AM
Haunting emotions, at least as i read, and captured with such impact. You start and end this exceptional poem with an air of nostalgia---darn unforgettable!
Login to Reply
Date: 2/11/2017 10:17:00 AM
Poignant writing that expresses so vividly the aches of love at nineteen! She will have many chances to find her true love! Excellent! A seven dear, nette! Good luck!
Login to Reply

Book: Shattered Sighs