Happy 35th

How crazy is it that our moments are only separated by seconds The world is so vast And us Just tiny specs in it That time deems as it's Temporary possessions What more can we expect From this uncertain vitality In any given present second We're gifted With full intent Deemed good enough to receive This life This circulating breath This life and all of its undeniable Treasures that we get That Some invisible majestic being Bestowed onto us And yet As full and loud as the universe gets I still feel empty Alone and immensely Vulnerable like My 11 year old kid did When dad left Lonely, and afraid But now I can say I am aware today Nearly 35 Kinda angry, sometimes A little pissed I'm alive Older than my big sister is Since she died So many dealings Of unhealed feelings But the one that is constantly reappearing Is the feeling I don't deserve to live past the hours That should have been hers My time wasn't set up for her to die And me to keep growing old Without her by my side 35 I kinda hate that you are here Just feels like you are rubbing it in my face That I am now the oldest one from the brood Living today Don't tell me I should be grateful I have breath and flesh to celebrate another earthly year It's crazy How huge moments are separated By only seconds To think we are all just Tiny dots in this universe Then we just disappear Here Where hours turn to days And days to years I'll grow old With just a million moments of your memory here That You left in a moment On a day Of a year One I can never delete or clear 7 days short of your 35th year I didn't look forward to this day When I knew it would be here I actually remember thinking Great, 35 That's going to be a tough year.