Guilty Last Goodbye
Nervous sensation, this does not feel right
Awaiting my call for my one last sight
As I walk slowly into this minimal room, I don’t want to look
A life has ended, now a closed book
My courage expands for one brief glance
This still feels wrong but I maintain my stance
Resisting my urge to turn and flee
I stay for the sake of my grieving family
One more pointless stare
This tall man looks smaller in the coffin lair
An inappropriate chuckle inside, a smile on his face
The irony is he never smiled often
For one brief moment my hard heart begins to soften
Curious glances persist
Although I try my best to resist
This still feels wrong to me, all haunting and ghostly
It’s not what I want to see, I want my last thoughts to be the happy memories
Should I feel shame for finding this wrong?
I stand all rigid, this feels so long
Or should I feel shame for my presence at an uncomfortable viewing
Would I feel guilt if I stayed home stewing
A wave of guilt descends regardless as no tears have dropped my eye
Anyway Granddad it’s time to say goodbye
Copyright © David Bull | Year Posted 2011
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