Growing up is hard

I think the hardest things
Are about letting him hurt 
When I know the suffering is real. 
Letting him choose to do what he can
And can't
And knowing I can't help.. 
I can't ask for more of him
Because there's nothing left
And he needs encouraging
Especially when I'm worried it's not enough.

It's impossible to balance wants and needs
When I want him to live
But need him to feel loved. 
When I worry about his health
And struggle with my own.. 
Our children always come first, 
Shouldn't they? 

My abilities fall short of the requirement
And in this, he's just like me.
I'm failing him, Myself, My family. 
And there's nothing more to do
That's not already being done.
Nothing I 
can 
do, anyways. 

I've nothing left, either.
My actions lack kindness, gentleness,
And my inner strength is insufficient.
I feel like no man at all.
I’m not even strong enough to love
Properly love
The man I've raised. 

Growing up is hard-- 
Thought I'd do it better by now, 
And yet, I've far to go.

Copyright © Matthew Wetter | Year Posted 2025

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