Greetings Nephew!

The dreaded news came from his Uncle Sam with a nice salutation: "Greetings, Nephew! I need you to help defend the nation!" He pleaded with the draft board but they turned a deaf ear. "Your claim of hereditary hang nails won't do, now get outta here!" At Fort Bleak, the sergeant said, "Your army career has just begun! Forget Mom, Dad and Maggie Mae, you belong to me now, my son! Just pay attention, keep your mouth shut, don't give me any sass; Keep your brogans shined, weapon cleaned, always salute the brass!" The clothes they issued didn't fit, he looked a terrible disgrace! His shoes were so big, that in them he could do an about face! Herded to the barber, he was shorn of all his hair! Two hours in the army and already sick of the entire affair! He presented both arms to the medics for numerous injections. His trembling nude body was subjected to minute inspections. At last thro' the induction line, his head reeling and spinning! No sympathy from the sergeants - they just stood there grinning! The baffled recruit marched to the mess for the evening repast. Gravy on toast and figs on a steel tray left him hungry and aghast! The sergeants finally let him collapse in his welcoming cot, Completely befuddled and bewildered by his hapless lot! Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired (© All Right Reserved)