Go West, Young Man
~ Corny Narrative ~
Go west, young man, he was told, so he did
He was only eighteen, a big raw-boned kid
His girl still back east, a lump in his throat
A high price to pay to sow his wild oats
So, he plunked down in Kansas, Prairie Land
Just a spade, a horse, and his two strong hands
He carved him a dug-out under the ground
He'd laugh at the wind and coyote sounds
He tilled that soil, and he planted his crops
Corn for millet, then potatoes for hops
For himself, he'd whip up some rabbit stew
He was gonna be fine, gonna make do
Now you're all waiting for that 'shoe to drop'
But there's no 'but;' his good luck didn't stop
Corn sprung up high, potatoes a-plenty
New settlers came, around about twenty
So he sent for his girl the love of his life
They'd marry, have kids, she'd be a fine wife
Well, she took one look, went back to New York
Said, "There ain't any pigs, I only eat pork!"
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