Gaslit Nightmare
Willingly, I ran
That was the first sign my life was falling apart
Strange bike that brought me back in one piece, damn you
That hope of abduction never came to fruition
I am complacent in the wake of my life’s finale
Climbing those eight flights of stairs
Only to prolong my denial
Too choked to speak
Life has always been easy
I realize you are a hologram
Motion picture of a mother
You are complacent in the wake of my life’s finale
Sent to bed at five o'clock
The same time it's been since yesterday
I fake asleep
When you walk in with my father
Coughing lies and webs of drunken incongruencies
I am complacent in the wake of my life's finale
We eat, and I sit by the water
Black tide splashing up to my toes
For a moment, I dream of drowning,
Fanatically gasping for air
I'm pulled away by the arrival of pasta
I do not eat, but rather stare as you finish
One, Two, Three, Four
Glasses of wine
I threaten to walk until I'm pacified
Moron, you call me
As we arrive, safely
Climbing those eight flights of stairs
Only to prolong my denial
My eyes are closed
I fake asleep
Sober at midnight
I said something that had scared you, though you don't quite remember
Please talk to you
I liked hearing you beg
Ignoring you in my bed,
I fake asleep
I wake up alone
Breakfast waiting for me
I do not eat.
Yesterday did not happen
I'm seventy feet under
Quite easy it would be to die here, I think
I wish I had.
I was complacent in the wake of my life’s finale
Resurfacing, I refuse my favorite fruit
I do not eat, but rather stare at the water
For a moment, I dream of drowning,
Fanatically gasping for air
I’m complacent in the wake of my life’s finale
We drive in silence
Still crunchy from the salt
I fake asleep
I never woke up
Hypnotized by your lies and
The gaslit fire that kept me warm in my slumber
I dreamt of drowning,
Fanatically gasping for air
Until I fell still, complacent in the wake of my life’s finale
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