Friendly Fire

Your eyes were roaming over my ruined life And I could feel the shame rising up A hurricane in my chest, hot winds ripping through my body I could have collapsed under the pressure of your silence Time. Tick. Tick. Tick. My mouth spewing forth useless words Fill the empty space and drown a little more Gasping. Clawing. Failing. Please go. I'm not normal anymore My world revolves somewhere outside of the boundary of goodness I'm untouchable now Not like you or you or him And the pity seeping out of you, It burns like I'm drinking bleach And my need is struggling to be seen You've done all you can for me Just walk away And tell me to take care And let me be forgotten. Maybe you think I don't want to be like you Or that I cannot manage being alive Incapable of connection Maybe unworthy. I'd take your brutal honesty But nobody has spoken to me in years Nobody has tried to reach beneath the fog I'm not worth that kind of effort. It's okay. Just go.