Free

As I stand a top this bluff I stare down at the path That got me here. At moments it was Bleak and narrow And I thought I’d never see the end. Never say never, They say. Because my life came Full circle. I had to lose everything, To feel like I belonged To something. I found out Who I wasn’t. I longed for home. That feeling of security Is something I missed so dearly. Words are hard to find To describe The woes of that life. Mistakes litter my path, I overcame feelings of guilt That I thought would most definitely kill me. I had to accept myself for who I was, Not who I wanted myself to be. I had to really get lost To be found. I achieved self discovery Through the trenches of addiction, Life taught me some lessons Through all of the tension. Forgive me for my hesitation, I was battling myself And my afflictions. I was too stuck in depression To see the wrongfulness of My convictions. The truth is, The heartbreaks in between then and now, Were stepping stones That lead right back the the steps of my once house. I had to learn who I was not, What life wasn’t meant to be To really see the destiny that Had always Awaited me. It was sitting, Idly, Waiting for me. They could have carried me, I wish I would have listened then, But my ears were full of cotton And I was hell bound. There was no stopping the demon From running to hands that fed my addiction, They may as well have left me for dead. There were no hand ups from that hell, Because in the end They all left me Bettered, Bruised And withdrawling. It was me who chose to stand myself Back up And keep fighting The good fight. In the end, It was my family who welcomed me back. It was like walking through heavens Pearly gates When I first stepped foot Back home. It washed over me Like holy water I received it, Lovingly. Words can’t describe How warm and safe I felt. Through all of the bad days, The good, And those in between, I finally found myself again. Now when I look in the mirror I see her, I feel like her, She is me Once more I’m finally free.