Fractured Canterbury Tales

For the benefit of any non-Middle-English speakers, a literal, word-for-word translation has been provided beneath each line of the original: Whan that Aprille with his shoures soote! When we've already had enough! of April showers Whan priketh hem Governeur in oure corages Our prick of a governor locks us down in our garages Than longen folk to goon on pilgrimages Ha, ha! Our goon squads are itching to go on barrages And smale fowles maken melodye And assault thine ears with foul-mouthed serenades That slepen al the night with open ye 'Twill fershloft three far aye with mnemonic charades ~ A special thanks to Middle English translator, Barry Kanter