Forgiveness

I was living in darkness I was blindsided by love I wasn't in love I don't want to be alone I was looking for love In wrong places I was not in my right state I was mentally ill I chose a man Over my children In my eyes Not true at all I made bad choices Big huge mistakes Bad decisions I can change The present by what I learned From those mistakes or choices We fall down We get back up again I am sorry for hurting you Please forgive me No one is perfect I have learned How to listen to you How to show u love I had to go through Twisters of storms To realize reality Was not a dream I was incoherent I was hardheaded I started to give up My world my life Has been stolen from me My children are my World I was sick needed help And had learned my mental Disease and addiction Does to ur brain Behaviors of anger erupt NEVER SAY THINGS OUT OF ANGER YOU MIGHT REGRET I am sorry for the negative things you Said I said I NEVER meant those words Please forgive me I thought we shared a lot Good memories as a family The good times out ways The bad times we had I had tried to teach you Respecting your elders And when we talk to do it calmly We don't have to scream Things you saw me do was not right I was unaware I had did Those bad things in front of you I wasn't wanting to see The whole picture I was Teaching You manners And honour and obey No child is to talk back Or be disrespectful to parents I never beat you I am sorry please forgive me When I had lost you all I lost hope Faith on Everything I was blaming Myself which is part to blame My actions got all my things I love taken away GOD said he won't Put more on you than You can bare How am I supposed to love I was never loved So I did things for you My mother never did for me All I wanted was to love u And keep you safe from harm I NEVER had that from mine All I wanted was to be best Mother I NEVER had Give you unconditional love I never had gotten I am sorry for not listening to u Please forgive me I deserve to have a second chance To show u I'm not the same I know what to do if I get upset I know now to not take anger out On you all and destroy things Or try to harm myself I have been able to control Maintain my anger and listen To your needs or wants Spend time with you all Individually and as family Let's move forward and start Over fresh and new beginning And let me show you what I have learned You have to try to forgive me I am sorry for what happened Please forgive me