Finding Inspiration

I had a sad yesterday, so overcoming today is the only way to have a happy tomorrow Hoping my pen allows me to express myself after I open this brandy bottle Will I find more inspiration after a few drinks? Or will I just be writing about old thoughts with new ink? I'm an average poet at best, but I still think I'm not reaching my potential Do I focus too much on double rhymes rather than keeping it simple? Has my love for Hip-Hop made me forget how to write from a non hip-hop rhyme scheme? Am I wrong for pouring my heart out on the page as my mind bleeds? I'd love to write a happy love poem, but I used to use girls as a vice, so please don't ask me for girl advice Plus depression has left me too burnt out to set her world alight Life keeps beating me down until I'm hurt inside It makes me sick to my stomach but all I can do is hurl up pride I sit and analyse my rhymes, like do these words even go together? Maybe I could use a professional writer to help me make it flow better Maybe I'm wrong, maybe I'm better than I think My love for writing will never go, I love when I'm together with the ink