Fear of Failure
It was as real a fear as any that one could encounter.
Fear is torment, and comes with the purpose to intimidate and eliminate. I have encountered the fear of punishment and fear of bodily harm. I have feared darkness where one is at a loss of his surroundings.
As a child I was terrified of polio shots administered once a year.
There are fears that come and go, and we learn to adjust and adapt. There are myriads of phobias and fears that threaten us all, but there is a fear I wish to share. It is a fear with which I struggled and have had to confront, conquer, and dispatch.
I fought for several years until I conquered and overcame 'the fear of failure'. This fear did not accompany me at birth as if I inherited it from ancestors. I created conditions and aspirations that painted pictures of accomplishments and achievements whereby I dared not to be anything less than the master of all my hopes and dreams. I could not accept the normal or the mundane. I believed that I would excel no matter what. However, I came to realize that I was being captured and imprisoned by my own mind set. I was becoming obsessed and driven to avoid what I perceived as an unacceptable life, and thereby becoming afraid of what might become a reality. Thus the 'fear of failure' in reality reduces one's abilities and capabilities.
When I released myself from the drip of such a fear, I became free to let go and let me be the best me that I could be without trying to please and convince me as well as others of how wonderful I could be. It was a fear from which no one else could emancipate me. God's wisdom and grace granted me the sweet freedom from the fear of failure.
09132017 PS Contest, Fear 2, Debbi Guzzie
Copyright © Curtis Johnson | Year Posted 2017
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