Farmer John

FarmerJohn took Tractor Weekly Sat and avidly read it all Even cut out tractor pictures And hung them on his wall FarmerJohn loved his tractor Prized possession of his life Some said he loved it more Than He loved his darling wife He would clean and polish it Regard his reflection with pride And John really enjoyed His every tractor ride Then one day it exploded Causing Him much actual bodily harm And Farmer John banned Every single tractor from his farm, He took his Tractors weekly And burned them one and all Even took down the pictures that That had hung there in the hall And Farmer John retired With his darling wife, Started to enjoy His newly tractor free life Took to his retirement With the greatest of pleasure, Took to taking the odd pint Which he drank at his leisure One day the pub was filled With toxic fumes and smoke A dangerous situation Not in any way a joke Standing there calmly In the centre of the room Farmer John slowly inhaled Every bit of smoke and fume. Then walking to the door Slowly let it out with his breath Thus saving many people from An almost certain death. How did you do that asked One grateful surviving man FarmerJohn ruefully replied I’m an ex Tractor fan