False Gifts and Purgatory
what do you want from me?
you have cemented yourself to my side and I have nothing to give you
nothing to offer
you have tied yourself to a sinking rock
I didn’t ask you to, so I don’t know why you did
you can give me the whole “it’s out of love” speal
but this isn’t love
not to me
now maybe for you it is
but for two heartbeats to pulse at the same time
you have to be on the same wavelength
and I can tell you now
we aren’t even hooked up to the same machine
so now that you have encased your entire being around me
I’m sinking faster
faster into an abyss that you don’t need to drown in too
I’m not saying that to be selfless, some other kind of love you’re fascinated with
no
it’s for your own good that you are neglecting to pay attention to
you want me to thrive?
be the amazing person only you think I can be?
then let go of me
stop suffocating me
every second that you rest yourself upon me for your comfort
is another breath I cannot take
you are not the cause of my demise
please know that
I was already crashing down before you met me
and while you had slowed my descent
you have begun to push me back into a fiery fall
and you’ve kept your big, pretty smile on your face, even when your clothes started to burn
you nag me not to hide from you
but I can see how fake that stupid grin is of yours when you are being insane
acting like everything is fine and dandy
how dare you
don’t you give me that
I just ask for honesty and you blatantly lie in my face
you are a lying hypocrite
and you can go to hell
but don’t come to mine
Copyright © Elise Clonts | Year Posted 2017
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