Escape

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Jan. 24. 2024
You Choose Again Poetry Contest
Sponsor- Brian Strand

 

at the edge of the cliff, 
she stood,
determined…….
eyes limpid pools of sadness
hair wind swept.
flawed….
damaged?

the swirling enormity below
inviting….!
nested in her own ignorance,
never knowing there’s poison,
in the sting of bees,
as dripping honey
in their combs.
in the heat waves of life
consumed without flame
yes, an escape ineluctable!
perhaps more to cover a secret…

SWISH….!

the water below parted noisily,
sloshed up… but the tug was fierce.
down, down….
she slid,
into the silver chambers
to be garlanded by mermaids!

Copyright © | Year Posted 2024



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Date: 1/27/2024 3:41:00 AM
Hi Valsa my friend what a decision to take, but I'm certain that people who reach this stage, are pretty determined . what a long way down it seems, and yet a welcome scene to end the torment in his soul. He takes the plunge and splashes with a thud into the watery depths of the sea, where gentle mermaids surround him. A fantastic entry, good luck in the contest. Hugs and love Jennifer.
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Date: 1/24/2024 9:39:00 PM
A brave one you describe in this one and a great closing line, Valsa. Good luck in the contest, my friend. Bill
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Date: 1/24/2024 10:57:00 AM
Back to congratulate you on your placement in the contest..
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Date: 1/24/2024 10:45:00 AM
Sad emotions, ending life to meet mermaids, needs a show of love and warmth around.
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Date: 1/24/2024 6:15:00 AM
Love it, hope you have been doing well my dear friend, your writings captivate me into the depths of the soul, thank you for sharing your beautiful gift with us all : )
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Date: 1/24/2024 5:23:00 AM
Hey Valsa... Your poem is a vivid and evocative portrayal of a moment on the edge of decision, weaving together elements of danger and allure.A powerful exploration of a moment suspended in the delicate balance between determination and vulnerability. The vivid description of the protagonist standing at the edge of the cliff, with eyes as "limpid pools of sadness" and wind-swept hair, creates a poignant image of a soul at a crossroads... love this one best of luck.
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Date: 1/24/2024 4:25:00 AM
To be garlanded by mermaids, how descriptive is this poignant write sweet valsa, i love your free verse, your words just flow so seamlessly! So many lines stood out for me and the picture youv used too is so fitting for the poem. I especially loved “ the swirling enormity below inviting….!nested in her own ignorance, never knowing there’s poison, in the sting of bees, as dripping honey.“ the wisdom and philosophical depth in those lines is truly soul hitting and made me think so deep! Love ths
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Date: 1/24/2024 3:44:00 AM
You describe such sad emotions so well. May the mermaids save her.
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