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Eldritch Dark

The things that lurk I dare not lark For nothing is ever what it seems In that lonesome and eldritch dark Sounds of melancholy lark Harboring thoughts that suddenly gleam Those eerie sounds I dare not hark Kids that once laughed through out this park Now swallowed whole by nightmarish dreams In the lonesome and eldritch dark It comes to me, sudden and stark What was there in the light of moonbeams But, no, I mustn't stop to hark Something as rare as Noah's ark; A shadow a-midst a silent stream In that lonesome and eldritch dark The devil himself won't embark I solemnly swear I've heard his screams And lord have mercy, I stopped to hark, In that unforgiving eldritch dark!

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Laura Breidenthal

Date: 3/14/2016 6:29:00 AM

I love the title - it drew me in immediately- it's such a cool word. hehe ^_^ "The devil himself won't embark" OKAY I'm convinced , this is spooooky! I'd probably be the idiot exploring farther than I should ;) Always, Laura

Timothy Hicks
Date: 3/15/2016 6:07:00 PM

The blondes are usually the ones that die first in those situations ... your picture looks brunette, so I wouldn't worry too much ;) Thanks for taking a peak at some of my earlier work ... this poem was inspired by that word, "eldritch", a word I first heard in the works of Lovecraft, and I loved it so, I had to write about it :)

Tom Quigley

Date: 2/29/2016 10:09:00 AM

Great poem! No nacreous glows from below?

Tom Quigley
Date: 2/29/2016 10:24:00 PM

Nacreous and eldritch were a couple of my favorite Lovecraft terms, and I guessed that might have been an inspiration given the poem. Just throwing the reference out there; certainly not implying it needed improvement!

Timothy Hicks
Date: 2/29/2016 9:41:00 PM

Thanks Tom. Perhaps it might have been nice to add some contrast ... but it was rather an unforgiving dark. This particular poem was inspired by the writings of H. P. Lovecraft, and his use of the word "eldritch"...

Teddy Kimathi

Date: 2/29/2016 6:39:00 AM

Greetings Timothy. Congrats for having your poem featured in the Poetry Soup homepage!!! ;-)

Timothy Hicks
Date: 2/29/2016 9:39:00 PM

Thanks Teddy! I wasn't aware of this...

Richard Lamoureux

Date: 3/22/2013 11:41:00 PM

I am not familiar with the form but enjoyed the poem.

Timothy Hicks
Date: 3/22/2013 11:53:00 PM

It's kinda hard to explain the rhyme scheme over typing (or perhaps I'm too lazy to do so at the moment... haha). ANYway... villanelles are fun to play around with, but it's hard getting the hang of the repetition. Thanks for reading.

Wayland Bunch

Date: 3/13/2013 2:05:00 AM

I didn't want to close so quickly, but was running out of space lol. I do want to thank you again for reading my poetry, and once again, I really do like this poem. I like rhyme forms obviously why I have started with the quatern now. Thanks again for reading and sharing.

Timothy Hicks
Date: 3/13/2013 10:50:00 AM

Hey man I appreciate your insight and honesty! Seems like a rarity these days... Typically when I write a villanelle I tend to vary the repeated lines. I know it's not "technically" correct but it feels more natural to me. And I'd rather write break a few rules then feel like I'm writing force-ably.

Wayland Bunch

Date: 3/13/2013 2:04:00 AM

You must know that I like this form, I mean probably my two best poems came out of this form. I like this poem here, very much, but will point out that you have kind of broken the form. The first and third lines of the first tercet, alternate to form the last line of the remaining 4 tercets and then form the couplet. Therefore they are repeated as is 3 times. The rhyme is right on key and like I say I do like the poem. I also have still been watching the following and thanks for the comment.

Dinda Minardi

Date: 3/11/2013 1:38:00 AM

A very dark poem you have here. You brought me into eldritch dark that I try to open my opened eyes and cover my ears from those screams.

Timothy Hicks
Date: 3/11/2013 9:06:00 AM

I was inspired by Dylan Thomas's famous poem Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night. Glad you enjoyed!