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Dragging the Deer Out of Bed

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Santa’s reindeer held a pre-Christmas party they all had such fun on their special day their Xmas dinner was so big and hearty they were too tired to pull Santa’s sleigh Rudolph had been drinking the sherry (it’s no wonder his nose is bright red) Other reindeer described him as merry and he would not get out of his bed Santa Claus was extremely unhappy When his elves dragged Rudolph out of bed He was sorry, Santa didn’t get snappy But this is what Santa Claus said ... ‘You’ve all over indulged at your dinner let’s hold your party much later next year You’ve got a year to lose weight and get thinner Now let’s get busy and bring Christmas cheer’ Poor Rudolph drank gallons of water he got sober and Santa's really happy They delivered the gifts as they ought’a but when rain fell it was Rudolph's wee-wee! Christmas Cheer Poetry Contest 12/4/18

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Pat Adams

Date: 12/6/2018 8:25:00 AM

You had me at the title! Really funny Jan! The ending didn't rhyme and cracked me up even more! Well done my friend!!.............pat...Ps wish I would of thought of the red nose! Very funny!!

Jan Allison
Date: 12/6/2018 8:32:00 AM

The red nose line is my favourite lol. I toyed with having Rudolph in a nappy but wee wee was close enough .. the grits would understand nappy but you call them diapers and I'm not good enough to rhyme that lol:-) hugs Jan xx btw the title was invented by Kim, I take no credit for that gem:-) xx

Lindsay Laurie

Date: 12/5/2018 7:47:00 PM

Golden showers and yellow snow - beware. I hope Rudolph don't end up with a black eye to go with his red nose - thank you Jan - Lindsay

Jan Allison
Date: 12/6/2018 2:06:00 AM

lol Lindsay, yes too much booze can cause lots of issues:-) hugs Jan xx

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 12/5/2018 5:01:00 PM

Cute ending, Jan!! ought'a and water. Another British thing hahaha. Would love to hear you talking in your British style one day!

Jan Allison
Date: 12/5/2018 5:49:00 PM

A little poetic licence there Andrea lol:-) hugs jan xx

Gary Smith

Date: 12/5/2018 2:02:00 PM

Well this brightened up a dismal day Jan, So funny. :)

Jan Allison
Date: 12/5/2018 3:10:00 PM

So glad you enjoyed the poem Paul:-) hugs Jan xx

Paul Callus

Date: 12/5/2018 12:05:00 PM

Lovely and entertaining, Jan:) Poor Rudolph...and those who experienced his sobering results! Santa should have known better than to give a party before the job had been done! Hugs // paul

Jan Allison
Date: 12/5/2018 3:09:00 PM

I had such fun writing the poem Paul I never know where my muse will take me - i wrote this and the fir tree poems when I was sitting supervising mock exams and had to do something to keep my brain active:-) hugs Jan xx

Constance La France

Date: 12/5/2018 10:36:00 AM

Jan, oh what a delightful write for the contest, truly it captured the Christmas cheer perfectly, well done and a winner to me ~

Jan Allison
Date: 12/5/2018 3:08:00 PM

Thanks so much Constance:-) hugs Jan xx

Lin Lane

Date: 12/5/2018 8:41:00 AM

Written in your usual funny lady manner and kinda rivals "Grandma got run over by a reindeer." Which would be worse, being run over by one or being peed on by one?

Jan Allison
Date: 12/5/2018 10:20:00 AM

I don't know the song so I guess warm yellow rain would be worse for me lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Bobby May

Date: 12/5/2018 6:26:00 AM

Very good and funny Jan, will you write a sequel next year about the deer?

Jan Allison
Date: 12/5/2018 6:34:00 AM

I'll see if the muse is willing lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Winged Warrior

Date: 12/5/2018 5:49:00 AM

A wee-wee of Christmas cheer...lovely fun write as per usual my weather forecasting friend...love & light...^WW^

Jan Allison
Date: 12/5/2018 6:33:00 AM

Thanks so much ^WW^ hugs Jan xx

Edlynn Nau

Date: 12/4/2018 9:58:00 PM

Ha ha! See you’re up to such fun! Just what we need as readers at times! Besting is in the mood. Good job!

Jan Allison
Date: 12/5/2018 3:28:00 AM

Thanks Edlynn I do my best to make folk smile with my silly poems:-) hugs Jan xx

Terry Flood

Date: 12/4/2018 7:37:00 PM

It’s a weird weird world... no sooner do I submit a cosmic golden showers poem than I stumble (er, slip?) upon this gem from yourself. Hmm... seems to be a lot of wee-Ing going on around here... oh... gotta go PS.. love it

Jan Allison
Date: 12/4/2018 7:39:00 PM

LOL Thanks Terry:-) hugs Jan xx

Carolyn Devonshire

Date: 12/4/2018 4:30:00 PM

Hilarious, Jan! I love it. Haven't even seen this contest yet, but who can help but laugh at your entry. Cheers to you, my friend. Hugs, Carolyn

Jan Allison
Date: 12/4/2018 4:39:00 PM

Thanks Carolyn I had such fun writing the poem my favourite line is about Rudolph's red nose - it even makes me laugh lol:-) hugs jan xx

Harry Horsman

Date: 12/4/2018 4:27:00 PM

Reminds me of your classic, limericks Jan, Awesome flow and rhyme ever so rhythmic. and the end it just had to be,,loved it all the way..

Jan Allison
Date: 12/4/2018 4:38:00 PM

I try to keep away from the limerick form and write in rhyme when I can but I just had such fun with this poem i hope Kim likes it:-) hugs jan xx

Rico Leffanta

Date: 12/4/2018 4:10:00 PM

Trust Jan to introduce, "Golden Showers" to Christmas; what is next for the reindeer, "Blowfart Express"? Another winner, Jan! Aloha! Rico

Jan Allison
Date: 12/4/2018 4:14:00 PM

lol Rico, at least I didn't mention poop lol:-) hugs Jan xx

M. L. Kiser

Date: 12/4/2018 2:40:00 PM

Oh my, I can imagine how long that rain must've been! (Really, I'd heard Rudolph had a drinking problem but, I just couldn't believe it at first; then I wondered how his nose got so bright red...I think I'll send him "AA's" number so he can get some help. This was great!

Jan Allison
Date: 12/4/2018 2:44:00 PM

Thanks so much ML I had such fun writing this poem today:-) hugs Jan xx