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Draft

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This you see is a draft Minds little notes of lines and verse In dribs and drabs In prose, I stab and stab Repeating oft said words Expressions rehashed to be reheard Yearning only for that one to see This my attempt at being me The ebb and flow of a sadness boat Feeble attempts to keep afloat Yet drowning in words it seems to be Prose no longer setting me free Learning more and knowing less Wise words not heeded at best For lingering in the dampness there Is death, burning slow with its evil stare

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Andrea Dietrich

Date: 10/29/2017 10:19:00 AM

Just came to say hello today, ARthur. I've been really busy this week before Halloween. Roasting pumpkin seeds, cracking walnuts. I love doing things in my kitchen. It takes away from my Soup time, but I'll be back here strong again!!

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 10/26/2017 7:49:00 PM

It's a depressing one but very well written, Arthur. Don't worry about repeating words. WE all do it in one way or another . All ideas have already been expressed but the beauty is in seeing them expressed by different mindsets.

Michael Tor

Date: 10/23/2017 12:17:00 AM

Love this theme Arthur. I think we have all been there. You expressed the lack of with abundance of thought and expression. Just the apposite of what your writing about because truly you have penned another fav for me.

Jean Murray

Date: 10/23/2017 12:06:00 AM

Death becomes you.

Sunlite Wanter

Date: 10/21/2017 6:20:00 PM

I don't think this is just about "Feeble attempts to keep afloat, yet drowning in words." Your last two lines seem to make it a deep metaphor! The more I know, the less I know.

Sara Ella

Date: 10/21/2017 5:33:00 PM

I think that you express yourself well here, Art. Hugs to you <3

Tim Smith

Date: 10/21/2017 9:27:00 AM

My craft brews from the many drafts shared...there have been many highs but all too many lows and can't forget about those in the gutter...so let your words ferment and breathe...let them leave you inebriated

Russell Sivey

Date: 10/21/2017 6:38:00 AM

The words will come to you eventually, even if they are repeated, the emphasis is different, or even if it is the same...the meaning comes out stronger! Poetry is one of those forms that comes and goes for people, there are times of writer's block, and other times of free flowing ingenious work! We just hope for the latter to keep going for as long as possible and the former to only be a very short time! Like right now, I don't have the flow, but I will soon, I can feel it! Great Work my friend!

Jan Allison

Date: 10/21/2017 3:03:00 AM

A thought provoking poem, beautiful yet so sad Arthur, I especially love 'this is my attempt at being me' - I can relate to this through my own experiences in writing as there is a little of 'me' hidden in some poems. :-) hugs Jan xx

Arthur Vaso
Date: 10/21/2017 10:50:00 PM

thank you Jan!

James Marshall Goff

Date: 10/20/2017 8:27:00 PM

Arthur...a writer of your talent need not to ever worry about forcing words on the page...I haven't written a poem in weeks...a spark...an angle....will emerge....magic will leap to the page when you can't stop it! of this I know to be true! keep peace in your heart, meditate in nature if even resting next to an ancient tree...inspiration will explode!

Arthur Vaso
Date: 10/21/2017 10:49:00 PM

Very kind words James, thank you!