Don'T Even Ask: Collaboration With Daniel Turner

Have you ever had one of those days 
On the wrong side of the bed, bad days 
When everything right went wrong 

Cause the ding had lost it's dong 
Ouch, Mr. Sun came peeking in 
Up from bed and banged your shin 
Leaky, full toilet overflowed 
Damn, you stubbed your other big toe 

Times like this: don't you love those days 
Hardly anything seems to go your way? 
Is little Johnnie turning green 
Splat! Is that doggie ice cream? 

Gas oven took a dump 
Everyone’s oatmeal was in clumps 
The kids were late AGAIN for school 

Wasn’t that traffic cop a tool? 
Oh, you should've just stayed in bed! 
Rolled back over and called in dead… 
Shoot! An hour late for work 
Emptied Starbucks on your shirt 

Dare you ask how this could get worse? 
Others think you're such a jerk. 
Next, the boss comes barging in 
Tells you,"Look for work again" 

Everything was going wrong 
Vacation's gonna be a little long 
Even your wife’s rope is at an end 
Now she says, "Let's just be friends" 

An asteroid fell from the skies 
Smashed the beer between the thighs 
Kick yourself for getting out of bed

3/24/16
Collaboration with Daniel Turner
Copyright © | Year Posted 2016

Poem

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Peterson Avatar
March 25, 2016 at 2:41 AM
What fun: adept and tightly composed.
Quigley Avatar
March 25, 2016 at 10:43 PM
Thanks! The collaboration was a fun back-and-forth iterative process, too.
Ashe Avatar
March 24, 2016 at 9:25 PM
Tom, This is hilariously funny!!! Good, good write!
Quigley Avatar
March 24, 2016 at 9:50 PM
Most of the credit goes to Daniel!
Allison Avatar
March 24, 2016 at 7:22 PM
crazy humour with great imagery well done guys:-) hugs Jan xx
Quigley Avatar
March 24, 2016 at 9:50 PM
Thanks, Jan!
Smith Avatar
March 24, 2016 at 6:57 PM
I just read this over by DT's....fantastic...a fave
Quigley Avatar
March 24, 2016 at 9:50 PM
Thanks, Tim!
Get a Premium Membership
Turn off ads, get more exposure for your poetry, and get more features with a Premium Membership.
Book: Diverse Voices: The Poetry of Human Rights and the Pursuit of Peace